sofiahjelm

Today I went to the shop and bought Spanx, blonde hair dye and toothpaste. These are my second pair of spanx I've bought this week, the first pair didnt fit, so I asked the lady this time if I was allowed to take them back, and she said -No, they are panties, you can't return panties!!!!!! really loud so that everyone could hear her then looked at me in disgust. They are not panties, they are spanx....Thanks Lizzy from counter number 5- may you die a slow and painful death.

I don't see the harm in wearing them, in fact I think I'm doing people a favor.. No one should have to see that. I'd rather step out of a car flashing my skin colours bicycle shorts than doing a Sharon Stone.  Especially since I will be stepping out of a black cab, not a white range rover sport.

Excited about the weekend, will be spending it in London with Nevick Caroline and Thommo. And on Sunday my sister is coming to town, gonna take her away from everything cool in London and bring her to Norwich, where absolutely nothing is cool.

I haven't told Thommo yet but I actually bought a pair of spanx for him as well... Manx!

Hey,

Back in Norwich after a weekend in Norway. It was amazingly cold amazingly nice and amazingly expensive as usual. On Friday night we had a couple of beers around the fire followed by 12 hours of uninterrupted sleep. Well, a couple of kids decided it was a good idea to play football outside our 1st floor bedroom window but part from that.

Spend the Saturday walking around Oslo, shopping and drinking lattes followed by a home cooked meal by a drunk Norwegian man. After dinner we had a party, a girl with fake boobies was there, that was the centre of all of our attention for quite a big part of the night. Stayed up til sunrise that morning listening Tania Stevens and playing cards around the fire.

Now I pack my bags again for Spain on Thursday, bring on Benidorm and sticky Vicky!

First in Friday morning, dark and cosy, turn everyone’s little lights on and have a chai latte.. mmm

Tonight me and Thommo are flying off to Norway to drink Moet and look at fitties. Norway is possibly the nicest looking country in the world. Apparently Norwegian men like Swedish girls though so I'll be extra Swedish this weekend.
Bought a brand new coat yesterday, walked in with it this morning, it's rubbish. It was so cold I won't stand a chance in Norway or Sweden this winter. But If you want to look nice you have to pay the price.

Had a Skype session with my mom last night for over an hour, turns out we both have a Facebook addiction so we ended up having two conversations at the same time, one on Skype and the other on Facebook. 


No I should get back to work really...

Spain next week, whoop!

xx

I’m back from a weekend of money spending, champagne drinking, bitch fighting and sleeping in London.
When I say weekend it was actually just one night but it seemed long enough. Managed to make my way to marble arch on Friday night and was met by Maria. We went home to get ready.. well I didn’t have much to get ready with as my bag was mainly filled with my pj's, pillow and towel. All three which I ended up not needing in the end. Painted my toe nails with Chanel and was told to take my tights of as I looked a bit too conservative, then that's me ready. Little did I know we were going to the biggest seller of Dom Perignon in the world... a place where you can buy bottles for £32.000 and have a drink in the grey goose lounge, never have I felt so out of place in my life. Although very drunk we managed to go to a restaurant at 6.30 in the morning and eat falafel and samosa. I fell asleep at the table, must have looked very sophisticated. I traded pints in a pub in Norwich with a greasy pizza on the way back to Movida and a late night restaurant visit with knife and fork.

Woke up at 14.15 by a text form my sister, realised I was on the 15.00 train back and the rest was just a mad rush to make it to my train on time... I didn’t by the way. Missed it majorly and didn’t make it back to Norwich until 7 at night.

Tack Maria for a good night out!

In about 1 hour I will be leaving the office and get on the magic train that will take me to London. Me and Maria are gonna Party tonight. I have bought new Jaspar Conran shoes for the occasion and a Heat magazin for the journey. Bring on 18.00!

x

On Saturday morning we got up, got dressed and got excited as we were going to watch spurs play man u. It was like being a wag for a day. Parked our little Corsa and got in the porsche.. drove all the way to London.. in the porsche... parked right outside the stadium.. the porsche that is and made our way to the Gary Mabutt lounge. In there we were given drinks and a three course meal, we also got to sit next to ex England player/ Tottenham player Ralph Coates, it was interesting. I had to pretend I knew stuff about football...

If you haven’t seen the two us of lately if probably because we have been out jogging too much. We are like the power couple of running, the athletes of Norwich, the twosome of fitness.  Bring on the half-marathon! 

Tonight is horse riding, daim cake with the parents in-law then of to bed because tomorrow i go HOME!! My driver will take me at 3.00am tomorrow morning!

Good bye Norwich!

Look after Thommo for me. He likes fish fingers and spaghetti hoops, toast with marmite and roast beef monster munch.

SHOCKING NEWS!!!


Late on Thursday night a young Swede received a phone call from the company cleaner claiming she was locked in the building. After trying everything else the lady claimed she had no choice but the call the young Swede as an attempt to be helped out of this chocking situation. Being the star that she is the young Swede quickly dressed appropriately , ran to her car, drove through the city, parked up, put her hazard lights on (just to add to the effect of it being an emergency) and rescued the lady from her imprisonment.

This story is the remarkable proof that there still are good people out there who will go out of their way to help a person in need.

If you see the young Swede give her a tap on the shoulder and a smile as she is an inspiration to all of us.

This week’s rose goes out to you, you are the hero of the day young Swede. 

As you all will be pleased to hear I passed the dentist appointment with flying colours. If my life was turned into a film it would be an animated film and I would play a superhero and my superpowers would be endless eating and chewing of sweets without harming my teeth. All children will be jealous and all parents will ban my film from being shown in fear of their children developing an unhealthy addiction to sweets. Oh and my character would be played by Rachel McAdams, did a quiz on Facebook and they told me. Could be a lot worse, she is fit.

Last night I helped Vicky paint their dining room. It was fun, I drew inappropriate pictures on the wall, thought it would be funny but I was told off and had to paint over them. My dad would have found them funny! It was his kind of humour. When I came home Thommo told me he managed to lock him and his friends out in the back garden and had to have an Irish man crawl through or window head first to let them back in.

Part from that not much has happened in the life of thommo and Sofia, I made homemade burgers but accidently bought turkey mince instead of normal mince, thommos tummy did not agree with fried low fat bird meat and bbq sauce so I won’t be doing that again. Part from that have managed to set our fire alarm of three times in one week.

Tonight we are watching seven pounds and I'm making homemade bread. Watch this space, I reckon the fire alarm will go off again.

x x

On a trip home to Sweden in 2006 I went to the dentist. I was living in Luxembourg at the time and thought it would be a good idea to go while at home. He told me my teeth were fine but gave me a list of things I needed to do to keep my teeth healthy and said if I do them every day I will be ok. Three years have gone by and how many times have I done those things? Nill, none, cero, absolutely not even once.

My dear ginger was told about this and booked me in to see an English dentist.. on Tuesday. Next time you see me I might have teeth like Cheryl Cole.. they will take all of my old ones and replace them with plastic ones.. that's how bad I expect this to go.. I need moral support. Dentists scare me more than snakes and sharks combined. And the fact that I'm going to the dentist in a country where 50% of the population have half of their teeth missing due to heavy tea drinking and smoking makes it so much worse.. HELP


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bOtMizMQ6oM 


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Back in the office after a long weekend full of fun.

Friday was spent at a very surprisingly original hen party.

Saturday was Allton towers with Liz and Matt. Awoke at 5.15am ready for a 4 hours drive, but some chav thought it would be funny to kick our wing mirror off... no wing mirror no 4 hour drive on the motorway so we had to take Liz and Matt’s car. They didn’t have a working radio but that didn’t matter, you don't need a radio when Thommo has had 3 cans of red bull and an energy shot. If we had a radio he would probably ask us to turn it off so he can tell another one of his stories.

On Sunday we went to a car boot sale where I bought onions.. I don't even like onions.. but they were locally produced.

Yesterday was the best day of the weekend..We went for a meal, had a walk through the city, looked in some shops, bought a DVD and then had a Starbucks.. Thommo ate a pizza called Sofia.

As you can tell we live a very exiting life here in Norwich and I'm sure we'll do something rather exciting again soon... watch this space...

Not much has happened lately to report part from our house move.. It's the most beautiful house in the world..
well, we share it with spiders the size of my hand, a neighbour who hasn't collected his mail for a couple of months (is he dead) and a coin meter!? really? Once a week we are woken by a alarm clock sounding grinding noise telling us we are running out of coins and must put a new one in or we will lose all the food in our fridge! it's amazing how far developed England is!


Been to the stables to ride my fat albino horse again a couple of times.. well, not mine obviously!
Last time when trying to get a fly away from his private bits while still on the horse I managed to get the whip jammed between his bum cheeks. Never seen anything like it, it was horrendous. Poor thing never saw it coming.. it was written all over his little screaming face  "get whatever stuck up my bum out right now!" Liz was laughing her head of while trying to pull it out..

Now I must go back to work.

Good bye!

This week me and Chris went to see The Proposal, my proposal?.. don't see it! Waste of money and 1 hour 30 minutes you will never have back.  The final scene where she goes home and leaves him behind only to realise he does actually love her and need his Granny to fake a heart attack to that they can fly to the airport and stop her plane in time for him to tell her that...HE LOVES HER. What was going through my mind all that time? only how badly I needed a wee. Had two pints just dying to come out and there was no way that was gonna happen. Had women glued to their seats on both sides and half of them were crying, they were not willing to stand up and let me pass, stick it out Sof, stick it out...

After the film we ran, ran so fast we thought we'd made it, but far more experienced cinema viewers had been slightly quicker and the queue to the loo's was about a mile long. We looked at each other like we held the greatest secret of all, we both knew what had to happen... back away from the queue slowly, you don't want people to notice you, then make your escape to the handicap toilets, when on the edge of peeing your pants rules don't apply to you.  

Little blonde moment for me though..

The toilet wouldn't flush! It just wouldn't... What can I do? if I stay any longer the people outside are gonna think I'm doing a number two. I had to face them , tell them the nasty truth.. opened the door prepared to meet a whole line of angry women but there was only one there, and she looked lovely so off I went. Took my time and explained what was happening, even went back in the toilet to point and make myself really clear. I apologised and smiled, might have said something about how lucky she was that I went in before and not someone who wasn't feeling very well (might have laughed after saying that as well) gave her a warm look then walked off. She didn't make a sound, nothing, looked at me with a confused stare but still not a sound, in chock probably.

Took me about a minute to realise I had been speaking to her in Swedish and that she had absolutely no clue why I had lead her into the toilet and pointed to my wee.

Late last night when I was at the highest of my sugar rush I decided to use that energy and go for a jog. The ginger kept insisting it was too late but I wouldn't listen.

I headed down the streets of Norwich listening to some tunes and all of a sudden I found myself on a street without much light and thought to myself that maybe that wasn't a very good idea, anything could happen, someone could jump out of the bush and get me, so I decided to move out to the middle of the road. That idea wasn't the best as cars kept driving down the road and I ended up running twice the distance because of all the zick-zacking I was doing.

Back in the dark of the payment a man suddenly appeared. What do I do? Shall I move to the other side of the street or shall I stay? If I move over he might think I'm scared and I will hurt his feelings which I really didn't want to do so I decided to stay on the same side of the street.  

Did not quite realise how narrow the payment was and we ended up in this sweaty out of breath street dance-off that lasted for what felt like minutes.

As I kept running I found myself in the same situation more than once, and my reaction was unfortunately the same.

So basically, female joggers have absolutely nothing to fear. Men on the other hand,  out in the hours of darkness, prepare yourselves to be followed and closely cuddled my sweaty women trying not to hurt your feelings.

Last night I was so kindly invited to a make-up party at my friends house.
     For those of you who don't know what that is I will try to explain this once in a life time event.

A stranger comes into your house bringing make-up. She then stands in front of a group of women placed in a circle and talk about these different products. It's then up to the hostess to get everyone as drunk as possible as quickly as possible to ensure they buy loads of things. Let the game commence...
 
As you're sitting in this circle you pass these products around so that everyone can have a try before they buy, basically a room full of tipsy women slapping make up on like there is no tomorrow.

The ladies toilets in a nightclub comes to mind...

Thank you K and C for that unforgettable experience. I will come again.

On friday morning I woke up slighty worried about the nights lack off sleep due to sleeping on an air bed with the ginger in pretty much daylight. The reason for this was my sister and her other half who were snoring away in what used to our bed.
I had a quick coffee locked the door and left for work, took me ten minutes before i realised i shouldnt have looked them in and had to leg it back home, they didnt have clue, still snoring away totally unaware that they were very close to have to spend the day in our minute flat making small talk all day.

Met them in the city after work were we ate a very much over prised lunch and a pint to take my mind of what was about to happen but it failed miserably, I was very much aware of what I had agree to do, again i might add.
 
The place was full of boys with baggy pants and needles. It hurt, alot. Spend ten minutes convincing myself not to jump out the window. The result? Mindblowing.

Tommorow I am driving my model friend to a photoshoot. Talk about feeling out of place.

S
 


Cicki och Sofia

Yesterday afternoon while at work my sister and the ginger came walking through the rain, my two favourite people. My sister had been travelling all day and had coffee stains on her tummy, like you do when you have been flying Ryan Air. A kid probably jumped on her while the mum and dad had a can of beer further down the aisle.

After rise cakes and drench we put our riding gear on and headed to the stables with the neighbour in the backseat munching on Dumle (Swedish toffee with a chocolate cover, they're special )

After being stuck under roof because of heavy showers we jumped on out horses and took off for the woods. Never have I laughed so much in my life.

A peaceful trot turned into a circus causing all of us to nearly wet ourselves.

We were skipping along the fields feeling pretty good, silence, sunshine, beautiful nature and then... my fat albino horse sneezes so hard he farts at the same time creating a gunshot like sound straight in my sisters horses face causing him to nearly have a heart attack... I'm sure you can imagine... we were crying of laughter.